Insecurities: Packing up my Baggage for the Journey

If I never try, I’ll never fail, but I will fail by never trying. I’ve been bruised inward, my experiences, my memories, my learned emotions. I’m afraid of being rejected, not being wanted, abandoned. A very common fear of anyone who has had any form of rejection in their lifetime.

I’m afraid the people around me, at school, work, in line at the supermarket, whomever they may be, won’t accept me. I’m afraid of being left when I need someone the most, because it has always appeared that’s the most likely time it’s happened. I’m afraid to get close to people in fear that I will unintentionally hurt them, which occurred in my childhood. This doesn’t apply as much to my romantic relationships, in those I fear I’m the one who will be hurt. I fear getting taken for granted, and that the other will spontaneously not care anymore. I over analyze my interactions in fear I was over the top, that I will scare them away. I fear that my invitations to them will be shot down. I get anxiety sometimes when their signals contain mixed messages.

These are the main fears all related to rejection, the list could be endless, but Insecurities will no longer rule my life unless I let them. I’m emotionally scarred by my past but I can’t let that own me. I know my worth more than I ever have. I can be a cool cat. My interests are weirdly interesting. The list goes on, but my main point is that my fear of rejection is irrelevant.

So what if one person is a lameozoid that doesn’t accept me. There will be others that will. On a relationship standpoint,  I need to cool my jets. If they are in relationship with me, they must like me and think I’m awesome. Why would they if they didnt? For all I know my insecurities could be causing them to have insecurities themselves by me holding back. Insecurities are chains that need to be broken. Roadblocks. Speed bumps.

“You are the master of your own puppet show.”

The way you jolt your strings creates the outcome of your life. You are the master of your destiny.

“The master of your own defeat.”

Break those chains insecurity has imprisoned upon you and spread your wings. You’re the only you this world’s got, you owe it to yourself to bring your best self to the table.

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