Life has been throwing me several unexpected hardball’s lately. I’ll get into that in my next post hence the name.
Anyways, a week ago something happened to me that I am still trying to wrap my head around. For the most part this kind of thing happens to celebrities, right? Not normal lower middle-class, everyday people, right? Let me explain. The guy that has been stalking me and my sister for the past year was found passed out drunk in my yard! The whole experience has sent my emotions in a tailspin. I feel invaded and violated that he even stepped foot on my property, and the items he touched while on my property…I feel like they are tainted or something. It’s hard to explain. There is also the fact he was outside my house that whole night while I slept…My mom called 911 the night before because she saw someone along our back fence. Authorities weren’t able to find him. The next morning I open the blinds to see some of our belongings in disarray and call 911. When a officer arrives he finds him passed out drunk on our welcome mat…
I’m going to put this out there since everyone who first hears about the case asks the same thing, “Have you ever been involved with this guy”. To be honest, it’s insulting. Very, very insulting. It is a big fat “HELLLLLL NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!”. A friend of mine that I went to high school with knew him and was having problems with him bothering them, so that’s the only reason I knew his name to begin with. That was 5 years ago. I actually have only been in the same place as him a handful of times in 2016, and only spoke to him on two of those occasions before the harassment started. The conversation the first time was just “Hi (Creeps name here)”, and “I like your shirt, yea I like that band”, innocent stuff like that. I always felt bad for him since he was an outcast and several people couldn’t stand him (not shocking at all in hindsight!). The 2nd time alarmed me a bit. He started talking about my sister, and I’m like, “Do you know my sister?”, and he answers, “No, but she’s a goddess”. Alarm bells go off! He says he never formally met her but he visited her work to “check her out”. Her place of employment isn’t even listed on social media… How did he know? A few months later he finds out where she hung out after seeing an online post of her at the place and started going there frequently until he runs into her. For the record, he has only formally met her and talked to her once!
After that this is when all hell broke loose! He later gets himself banned from said place my sister went to. Then the messages start… The anger is directed at me. The thing is what did I do? He implicates that he knows where we live and that, “if we want to start shit, he can just knock on our door”. Scary! What shit were we starting in the first place? It was very unnerving to find out an acquaintance knew where we lived. I find out he blamed me for being banned even though I wasn’t even there when it happened. And even more he blames me for keeping my sister from dating him. What? She has only met him once and said one sentence to him! He is mentally ill to those wondering, which makes it more scary, since he doesn’t think like you or me. He is capable of more unpredictable behavior.
For months on and off I got messages from him through different medias. One time he found an account I have where I don’t use my own name, and another time he finds my number through voting records. He knew things about me that weren’t posted anywhere, like my middle name. He knew my sister’s dogs name and our mom’s last name (different from ours). He’d call me derogatory names, tell me that I’m jealous of my sister, and that he’d be dating her right now if it wasn’t for me. Then it would stop for months. The next time I saw him, I let him have it! I give him a verbal warning that if he messed with me or my sister again I would get authorities involved. A few months later he is found on my property.
What advice I’d give to anyone with a similar situation is if anyone is harassing you, sending you any unwelcome contact, or being intimidating toward you in any way save your evidence and CALL THE POLICE! Just do it! It could escalate into something worse. When he was sending me unwanted harassing texts I thought it wasn’t enough to get authorities involved unless he was sending death threats, but I found out later that it was enough to take action. Don’t wait too long like I did. I’m lucky he didn’t try to break in my home, that he didn’t try to harm my mom when she left for work that morning, or harm my pets when they were let outside. I also was afraid he would get set off if I took any action, besides he was harassing me when I literally did nothing to him. I was afraid of what he’d do if I did; however, I wish I had taken action earlier. I found out he started harassing other girls in the time I should have taken action. You’re not just saving yourself in taking action against a stalker, you are saving future victims. Don’t be afraid to call 911.